Don't Blink: News Roundup for December 23

In the information age we are inundated by news and trivia, Don’t Blink is a regular featured designed to hilight a whole bunch of stories you may have missed in a relatively small amount of space.


Apparently the world is now so dangerous that even Santa Claus needs an armed military escort to cross Canada safely. So, if you're roof suddenly collapses, it's probably just Santa's fighter jets trying to land on it.

In other news, Ottawa says that "terrorists" are not really "terrorists" if they are fighting against Iran. Canada's first nations have decided they would like to be treated more like human beings and, even though his political career is done, Ontario Premiere Dalton McGuinty can't resist using international headlines to grab himself some publicity. Ironically, it was using money for political purposes and then coming up short on meeting provincial obligations that sank his career to begin with.

United States:

In the US President Obama and Speaker of the House John Boehner are considering pulling a "Thelma and Louise" off the fiscal cliff, and Mitt Romney didn't really want to be President of your stupid country anyway. =P

The gun control debate also got hot and heavy this week as the NRA held a press conference to lie some more. Among many other possible culprits the NRA blamed really old video games for US gun violence. Meanwhile it was revealed that American guns kill Mexicans too, Atlantic Wire pointed out that guns are economically expensive and Mother Jones demonstrated the ease with which a semi-automatic gun can become fully automatic.

In other news a TSA screener has launched a blog to tell the world what really goes on behind the scenes, the Republican party is continuing its disintegration, you can lose your job if your boss thinks you are really hot and the 2nd US Civil War may be over gay marriage.

The Other 95% of the World:

In India police clashed with protesters who believe that rape is bad. The political and police response could be explained by the fact that an alarming number of Indian politicians are apparently very pro-rape.

In China 500 people were arrested for believing in the Mayan apocalypse. Uruguay may not only legalize but nationalize cannabis and it is illegal to tell an Italian he has no balls.

 Science and Technology: 

In science news, the computer is about to be reinvented again, new solar panels can adhere to almost any surface, palm trees may provide the key to immortality, this microbe may be the difference between fat and thin, recycling is good, shale oil is bad, injecting rhino horns with poison could save the species, 'alien-like' skulls have been found in Mexico,  the coral reefs could be gone by 2100 and the EFF is going after bad patents.


It's the holiday season and religion has been busy. The Pope used Christmas to say that he really hates gay people, a man was beaten to death in Pakistan for blasphemy, and a Jesus burrito can help you win the lottery.


In more fun news, Boing Boing has a collection of weird xmas videos, Blastr has a good list of bad movies, Pussy Riot is awesome, Werner Herzog is awesome, Universal and Sony both suck, and Bat Boy saved the world from the Mayan Apocalypse.

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